Is Happiness an Accident of Birth?
“If we observe genuinely happy people, we shall find that they do not just sit around being contented. They make things happen. They pursue new understandings, seek new achievements, and control their thoughts and feelings. In sum, our intentional, effortful activities have a powerful effect on how happy we are, over and above the effects of our set points and the circumstances in which we find ourselves. If an unhappy person wants to experience interest, enthusiasm, contentment, peace, and joy, he or she can make it happen by learning the habits of a happy person. ”
You know those people who just seem to have been born cheerful? Their disposition, circumstances, and outlook all seem to align … and while you enjoy their sunny presence in your life, part of you wonders, why them?
Or are you one of these people? Do you find yourself wondering why others have such a difficult time looking on the bright side, noticing the glass is obviously half full, and smiling in the face of challenges?
Is it true that some people are just “born happy,” while others are not? Positive psychology says yes … and no.
According to research psychologists, some measure of our happiness is, in fact, genetic. I’ve seen the number cited as high as 50 percent, but more commonly between 30 and 40 percent. That’s significant, but it’s not everything!
You might think our circumstances would be an equally significant factor, but it makes up a surprisingly low 10 percent of our happiness. In fact, due to hedonic adaptation, even significant or catastrophic changes in our circumstances (such as winning the lottery or losing the use of a limb) result in only temporary changes to people’s overall happiness. Over time, most return to what researchers call their “happiness set point.” (In the case of winning the lottery, this happens within a year!)
The rest? According to researcher Sonja Lyubomirsky, author of The How of Happiness, 40 percent or more of our happiness comes down to intentional activity. Positive psychology focuses on that remaining 40 percent, studying the habits and activities of the happiest people. Positive psychology coaching draws from this body of knowledge to explore how anyone can apply those habits and activities—in the ways that work best for them—to achieve greater happiness and success.
Personally, I was not gifted a high happiness set point at birth. I have struggled with depression and anxiety most of my life, and I have sought plenty of invaluable treatment over the years from medical and mental health professionals. (Coaching is not a substitute for mental health treatment, and if you are experiencing depression, anxiety, or trauma of any kind, I urge you to seek appropriate treatment before engaging a coach.)
But controlling depression and anxiety only got me so far, back to “neutral” so to speak. The greatest contributions to my happiness have come from studying and applying the principles of positive psychology: practicing mindfulness and gratitude, identifying and using my signature strengths, taking steps to support holistic well-being, and more.
Contrary to popular belief, you’re not allotted an unchangeable amount of happiness at birth. You don’t even have to wait for your circumstances to change to feel happier and more alive. Regardless of where you fall on the continuum today, positive psychology can help.
